Noticed {Trifextra}

His memories were of pinafores and  gapped-toothed grins.

Later; a prom dress with a metal mouth.

But as red satin brushed her knees, her smile finally caught his attention…

… and his breath.

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Trifecta this weekend
(hope all of you are having fun on the beaches of Florida !!!)

is to take the message of “Third time’s the charm” and use it for our 33 words.

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It’s been an amazing week, wishing you all a WONDERFUL WEEKEND.

Thank you for coming over to read!

37 thoughts on “Noticed {Trifextra}”

  1. I know I say this a lot about your writing, but ‘oh my heart.’ You capture that breathless feeling so well.

  2. This is wonderfully written, and quite sweet.

    (…And yet the skeptic in me can’t help but stubbornly cross her arms and think, “Oh yes, he notices her NOW, that’s she pretty and braces-less!”

    Hmm… Methinks I should take my pessimism elsewhere! LOL)

    1. You know with only 33 words it’s hard to say that he was 3 years older than her..so it was “just a matter of time” kind of thing. Like the 3 Bears in Goldilocks..she was too young, she was too young, she was just right. ;)

      thank you for coming over to read me. I appreciate it SO much.

  3. I always kinda had a thing the grungey girls with braces at High School, red satin wins though. Hands down.

    1. that is a brave thing to admit and a wonderful one too.
      I had a perm, braces and a really loud voice in High School. ;)

      thank you for coming over to read, I appreciate the visit.

    1. Pinafore was such a good word to bring CHILDHOOD to the forefront wasn’t it?

      Hope you had a good weekend my friend.

    1. I wanted more than 33 words to say he was older than her..that those 3 years make a big difference when she is 6 and you are 9, or 12 and 15…or 19 and 16. But then all of sudden age doesn’t matter as much.

      But I am glad you liked it either way. :)

    1. yes, for both of them. If I had more than 33 words, I wanted him to be older than her..that it was TIME that had catch up for both of them.

      but thanks for the visit and letting me be part of this community, I do love hanging with all of you.

  4. You make me share the lad’s journey in just 33 words – can’t say I blame him though (knee length red satin… gosh). Wonderful job.

  5. Kir, I love this! It paints such a picture with so few words. Hooray for the ugly duckling who I’m sure was beautiful all along – just took her outsides some time to catch up :).

    1. HI
      first thank you for visiting!!
      and I’m so glad you GOT THIS, and from both sides. He was older than her, so it was TIME that had to catch up and make it okay for their romance to bloom.

      I really appreciate your comment. :)

  6. I’ll try not to be annoyed that it took red satin to get his attention and instead focus on the sweetness that she was there all along and he finally noticed :) You do write love so well.

    1. First, THANK YOU Janna,if I write something well, I want it to be LOVE.

      and he was three years older in my head so it was just a matter of time finally synching with their mutual attraction. (I never said she noticed him either..LOL)

      thanks for visiting, that’s the part that makes me HAPPY.

  7. Oh Kir-this is so wonderfully done in just a mere 33 words! Perfect-and congrats on your recent first place win! Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

    1. HI Val!
      thank you so much for this FANTASTIC comment, I am just hanging my head and trying not to tear up in the middle of all that love.

      <3
      thank you.

    1. he’s not..in my mind he was 3 years older than her..and time needed to catch up to BOTH of them.

      the romance is all there….you know me. ;)

  8. He was a bit slow on the uptake, wasn’t he? :) Hopefully she’s the forgiving type! Love the vivid imagery you used here. And congratulations on your well-deserved win!

    1. well not really, if I had more than 33 words I would have added that he was 3 years older than her in my head, meaning that life and time had to catch up with both of them…

      I wanted the romance and the idea that they were seeing EACH other in a different way for the first time. :)

      thank you for the wishes, I was very excited about my win.

  9. First, congrats on the win. Well deserved. I really felt for Daphne, I hope you bring her back. Love this coming of age story. Reminds me of a girl in Jr.high that I didn’t realize was hot until I was just a little too late. I guess we live and learn. ;/

    1. THANK YOU!!!

      he was older than her in my head, time needed time to catch up to the reality of both of them.

      plus we all have that one person we should have taken a closer look at when we had the chance. ;)

  10. You write “lovely” so well. Everyone should have their breath taken away, at least, once in their lives. To feel the magic of the heart is to be alive. Well done, my dear. :)

    1. you are TOO good to me. Thank you! And having you “proud” of me is such an incredible compliment, esp when I respect and adore your writing.
      :)

  11. Btw, congrats on winning first place!!!!!!!!! Very well-deserved. I am very pleased and proud of you. You are so talented. Bravo, Kir! Bravo, :)

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